Letra The Buffoon And The Valedictorian de Adam Sandler original

'And now the buffoon's date at the drive-in with the school's valedictorian.'

Valedictorian:> 'I really appreciate you're asking me out.
Most people are intimidated by my high academic achievement.'

Buffoon:> 'This movie sucks shit!'

Valedictorian:> 'Well, Ebel gave it thumbs up,
But Ciscel thought it was too preachy.
Anyway, I enjoyed the director's last film immensly.'

Buffoon:> 'Cathleen Turner has big fuckin' tits!'

Valedictorian:> 'Yes, well, she recently had a child.
I think her maternal biology may play a role in that.
She looks fabulous for a woman her age, doesn't she?'

Buffoon:> 'I put a firecracker in a bullfrog's mouth and blew his fuckin' head off.'

Valedictorian:> 'Well, in psychology we learned that it is not uncommon
For male adolescents to commit savage acts on animals as part of their maturing process.'

Buffoon:> 'That girl in the fucking car in front of us, she gives everybody head.'

Valedictorian:> 'Well, I guess she's strong for attention and she feels promiscuity is the only way to obtain it.'

Buffoon eating popcorn>
Buffoon:> 'This popcorn's fuckin' terrible. It tastes like someone jizzed all over it.'
Buffoon continues to eat popcorn>

Valedictorian:> 'Well the amount of semen on this popcorn is certainly disturbing.
Perhaps the staff in the refreshment stand was overcome
By the monotony of their work and decided to play a childish prank.'

Buffoon:> 'I looked at my asshole in the mirror today. It blew my fuckin' mind!'

Valedictorian:> 'It's ironic that parts of one's body seems odd
And unusual because you don't see them on a day to day basis.

Buffoon:> 'My father's shit stinks up the bathroom all fuckin' day!'

Valedictorian:> 'It's puzzling why one person's fecal odor can be more overpowering than another's.
I wonder whether it is a function of the food digested or that person's internal metabolism.'

Buffoon:> 'I'm gonna go get head from that fuckin' girl.'
Gets out of the car>

Valedictorian:> 'Well, I'm sorry to see the date come to such an abrubt conclusion.'
Buffoon walking away>
'I do appreciate the time you spent with me and look forward to a future rondevue.'

Buffoon:> 'I like to piss in that guy's fuckin' gas tank!'

Valedictorian:> 'Bye bye! Have fun.'
Buffoon continues to walk away>